You've Been Served!

(First an update on Phoebe)

We just finished two days of evaluations for Phoebe.

Yesterday, two ladies came to our house - a speech therapist and the child development specialist assigned to our case. They observed Phoebe and had her do some simple activities. For example, the specialist put two little red sugar pellets in a small plastic tube and shook them around. Phoebe tried to get at them with her fingers, but once she realized she couldn't reach them, she quickly dumped the plastic tube upside down, and they dropped out. This was deemed good "problem solving skills." She also had Phoebe try to stack a few wooden cubes, but Phoebe actually held them horizontally between her thumb and fore finger.

They also tried to get her to imitate certain sounds and astoundingly, she actually did! She mimicked the word "Grandma," which made all our jaws drop. She also said hi while waving and clearly babbled "Mama, Mama, Mama" while walking over to me. However, halfway through, it was clear that Phoebe was trying to communicate something as she was getting pretty upset. We didn't know if she wanted a drink or a snack, which is part of the frustration. We guessed a drink, which she sucked down. So this and some other things (like not being able to point to any body parts) puts her communication skills at about a 9 month level, which puts her exactly at that 33% delay threshold to qualify for services. The ladies recommended that we wait to start speech therapy until she's 18 months old due to attentions spans - the speech therapist usually comes over for 45 minutes at a time and there's no way a 15 month old could handle that.

Also, in order to qualify for services, our health insurance has to make a denial. Luckily, we had the Kaiser appointment today with a developmental pediatrician. This one was much shorter. I think he was looking for neuro-developmental delays or signs of autism. When the doctor called us in, Phoebe immediately started following him and giving him big grins, even though he was a stranger. He did some of the same little activities - the plastic tube and the wooden cubes - but he stopped once it was apparent that Phoebe doesn't have any signs of autism spectrum disorder.

He's going to "deny" the claim, which will start the public services. He also wants us to fill out the 18 month questionnaire at her 18 month well baby visit just to see if she's closing the gap a little more.

All in all, we're pretty relieved. We've seen so much improvement since late March that I still believe that D was not interacting properly with Phoebe or the other baby that was there.

............

Speaking of which, D's been served with papers! Finally. We had to hire a private investigator to track her down. This ended up being no small feat. She had continued to post ads on Craigslist for a nanny position, which of course made us so mad knowing she was trying to dupe another family into hiring her. The PI tried to set up an appointment with her under the guise of needing child care. She was so paranoid (with good reason, it turns out!) that she made her daughter run interference. So the PI and someone else (made to look like a couple) met the daughter, R, at a Starbucks or something with the idea that if it went well, they would meet with D the next day. It went well, but she was a no-show. R asked that they change the meeting to somewhere else. This all happened, mind you, while we were in Greece (another one of the dads handled hiring the PI). When we got back and I had still not heard anything, I emailed the other dad for an update.

Just on Tuesday of this week, we got the word that they had finally served her papers. Apparently, they had to have her meet them at a personal residence because she failed to show at any public places. She came to the house believing she was applying for a live-in nanny position and then they served her! The court date is June 24. I fully believe that she won't show up, but that's okay. We can still make our case without her.

(Of course, this woman has NO money right now, of that I am certain. I mean, she relied on a job that paid her monthly, so she likely hasn't had any money coming in since March. However, it's still worth it because we can ask the judge to add the PI costs to the judgement given how hard it was to find her - they still never figured out where she is currently squatting. Also, it's worth it to know that we can ask for her wages to be garnished, even get the IRS to show it when she goes to file her taxes. In addition, her name would show up in court records if employers did a background check on her.

Also, can you believe any sane person would agree to meet a potential nanny's daughter before meeting the actual nanny? If anything the families should be using a service to screen potential nannies, not the other way around. Uggh, this woman is crazy! I can't believe she took care of our daughters.)

Back to Real Life

Chris and I had such a great time in Greece. It was just what we needed after months of seemingly endless illnesses. Although I feel guilty for admitting this, it was pretty easy to "pretend" we weren't parents. For 12 days we didn't have to change diapers, we could go to bed when we wanted to and wake up when we wanted to without wondering if Phoebe would wake up in the middle of the night; and we even took naps in the middle of the day!

Most of all, we enjoyed being active. The trip to Greece was first and foremost a hiking trip. We ended up doing four hikes - one each on Tinos and Naxos Islands, and two on Santorini. The last hike on Santorini was optional and a make-up hike for the one we missed on Naxos due to some ferry snafu. Only six of us, including the two Greek guides, did the hike, but I'm so glad we did. I knew that it was the last time we'd be able to do these things alone for quite some time.

Of course we missed the girls and tried to do Facetime with them whenever we could, but given the time change (we were 10 hours ahead) and the spotty wireless at some of the hotels, we were only able to do so a few times. Still, I wasn't worried. My parents took great care of them, and the girls were both really happy and all smiles when we did Facetime. Phoebe waved at us and Charlotte blew us kisses.

So after the high of Greece, we were quickly pushed back down into reality once we got home. It took us over 26 hours of traveling -- from the Athens Metro to the airport to the shuttle back to our house -- to get home. During that time we didn't get much sleep, thanks mainly to crying babies about Phoebe's age on the long flight from Munich to Los Angeles. When we finally got home, at 2:30 early Monday morning, we were done. And then Phoebe started screaming at 6AM. We're still not sure why she was screaming, but from then on, every time we (Chris, my mom, or I) tried to put her down for a nap, she'd start screaming. The only time she didn't scream was when I was holding her - I think it was because she was afraid I'd leave her again.

And then Charlotte. Poor Charlotte started getting a fever last Friday night. My mom called the advice nurse on Saturday when her fever was around 102 and she had a troubling cough. Of course, the nurse just likened it to a cold. Unfortunately, it got worse yesterday (Monday) and the poor thing was not looking good at all, and her cough sounded horrible. Lack of sleep was getting to me, so I practically started crying when I called the advice nurse, who oh-so-helpfully pointed out that there are many different cold viruses, so she's not getting the same one. I pointed out that she has had a history of coughs turning into pneumonia, so maybe she needs to see the doctor.

My mom and dad decided to stay an extra day so we wouldn't have to miss our first day back to work after vacation. And my mom was so nice to take care of Charlotte during the night, so that we could get some uninterrupted sleep (we slept from 8PM to 5AM, when Charlotte's whimpering woke us up). Charlotte looked awful and refused to swallow any Tylenol, even though she was complaining about her ear and her head and her stomach.

The verdict? Pneumonia. Again. Her third bout in the past six months. What kind of petrie dish experiment is going on at that preschool?! She's on antibiotics for at least the sixth time in as many months.

 Since Charlotte still has a fever, I'm staying home with her tomorrow. Also, Phoebe's first developmental evaluation is tomorrow. Thankfully, it's at our house because the one on Thursday is about 90 minutes away, and it would be no fun for anyone if we had to Charlotte with us.

Anyway, it was a bit more of a dose of reality than we bargained for.

In the meantime, I'll be dreaming of this:

 And this 

Mother's Day and 14 Months Minus A Couple Days

Hey Everyone!

I hope you had a fantastic Mother's Day. I certainly did. Phoebe and Charlotte each decorated mugs for me. What's hilarious about that is that they each did them at their respective daycares, so it's a complete coincidence that I ended up with two almost identical mugs. When I say "decorated," I mean scribbled on. Charlotte says that hers is "beautifuler than Phoebe's." Ms. S. also included a little photo album of a bunch of pictures that she's taken of Phoebe on her phone. Very cute.

We went to a great place for breakfast and both girls were very well-behaved. Charlotte and Phoebe both gorge on breakfast - they are complete bottomless pits when it comes to eggs, waffles, pancakes, and fruit. After we got home from breakfast, we video chatted with my grandmother and my mom, who both loved seeing Phobe toddle around. Pretty soon, it was off to pedicures for Charlotte and me. It was pretty much the only thing I wanted for Mother's Day, since I'll be heading on vacation on Wednesday! However, I figured that since Charlotte loved the one time she had her fingernails painted, I'd take her on a little Mommy and Me Bonding Time. She is so thrilled by her toenails that she's been showing everyone, along with pointing out the pretty flowers painted on her big toes.

Yes, she's sitting on a huge teddy bear.

Since we're leaving on our big trip the day Phoebe turns 14 months, I thought I'd post my little update now.

Phoebe is a full-on walker now. Once she figured out how to stand up without pulling up on anything, that was it. She still looks like a bow-legged zombie, but she's pretty much a pro. It makes things somewhat difficult because now that she's walking, she really does not want to be held, especially in a new place. She also knows how to go down stairs by turning around and sliding down on her stomach. I'm still amazed by how fearless Phoebe is compared with Charlotte. Charlotte was very timid when it came to climbing on playground equipment or going down slides. Phoebe is already trying to climb up the slides. She also easily climbs up Charlotte's stool in their bathroom - and she can drink (fairly well) from Charlotte's regular non-sippy cup. She has no problem standing on different surfaces like rocks, sand, or grass.

On the flip side, Phoebe's language skills still haven't developed. She does what I deem is a "gurgle" - all of her babbling is in hard "g" sounds. While she was saying "uh oh" a few weeks ago, she's stopped that completely, so we're back to no words. We can't get her to sign much of anything, although we try to make her frustrated enough to sign "eat" or "more"; it doesn't usually work. We've checked out the "Your Baby Can Talk" DVDs a number of times from the library and while she's enthralled by the pictures of the various objects or actions, she still hasn't signed any of them. On the other hand, it's obvious she understands a lot. She knows the names of many different kids of animals and can point to them - her favorite animals are birds, cats, and dogs.

Ms. S took the kids to the pet store where Phoebe was apparently utterly enthralled by the birds.

The Regional Center called last week to set up their separate evaluation of Phoebe. The caseworker assigned to us will be coming to our house and bringing a speech therapist along with her on May 29. They'll be evaluating her development, but the caseworker did caution that it's hard to really work with a baby this young on speech. Their attention spans are so short that real therapy may be hard to do until they're at least 18 months old. The Kaiser evaluation with the developmental pediatrician is the next day. It's going to be a crazy two days, but I hope we'll be able to get Phoebe the gentle nudging she needs.